Quick writing exercise

We did a nice little writing exercise at tonight's jabber chat that you might want to try: "Write two sentences one must be 70 words long and the other exactly seven words. Oh and they have to comprise a paragraph. The challenge here is in contrast. You go from writing an extremely long sentence to a relatively short one, and they have to be related so they can exist in the same paragraph."

Here's mine:
Sarah pounded the immense, heavy keys of the gigantic typewriter that now filled the bulk of the space within her bedroom, crushing her bed beneath its dark, metallic shape; she ignored the pain of her bruised fists as she shouted her kiai and caused the letter bars within the massive type writer to flip upwards with great force, smashing their imprint through the black ribbon onto the pristine white surface of the giant paper. "I will get this essay written tonight!"

Share yours with the group!

I would like to submit that semicolons should be counted as cheating, since that basically makes it two sentences. ;)

Corrupted Flame wrote:
I would like to submit that semicolons should be counted as cheating, since that basically makes it two sentences. ;)

You can submit that idea, Joe, if you can successfully write a 70+ word sentence without using semicolons :-)

As the imposing form of the enemy ship's menacing steel hull descended from the cloud cover, Captain Rebecca Falconwing might have thought about the splinters and snarled shards of metal its cannons would reduce her precious airship to if it were able to hit her with a broadside assault, but there was only time to spin the helm and listen to the groaning of giant gears as the craft presented its aft airbags, coliloquy known as hemorrhoids or even, to use the kinder lexicon, "butt" balloons by the less polished members of the crew, to the New York's starboard side. She could only hope it was enough.

Anobi wrote:
coliloquy known as

I meant colloquially. That's what I get for letting Google proofread for me.

Nice entry! And no semicolons--kudos!

--Tim

Thanks, I'm rather proud of it myself, and I think your challenge just sparked some ideas for one of my possible stories!

The weight of the darkness pressed in on him like a vise, and Fury wondered if this was it, if this was finally the end, and he conceded that it would be appropriate, his dying alone in the dark, since so much of the significant events in his life seemed to spiral outwards from the force of darkness that he was blamed, albeit fairly, for introducing into the Southern Reach. Only Zero and Lock would mourn him.

Nice entry, Carly! A lot of hinted-at story in those two sentences; and I like the names. The only very minor change I might suggest is "since so much of " to "since so many of ".

Ooh, good catch. I agree with you wholeheartedly.

Just getting the editing bug out of my system before November ;-)

Haha, I hear ya. XD